VENDOR TERMINOLOGY

 

In case you haven't noticed I use a lot of descriptive phrases that probably get 'lost in translation'.  I am providing this guide as a means of describing a lot of the terminology as it pertains to selling at events.   Quite often, I will make up non-existent words and phrases.  Here's a link to the Urban Dictionary which you might find interesting and contains many actual slang terms used by people.

Att.  Abbreviation in event publications, etc., describing the attendance with a number beside it.  Uusally inflated  several times by promoters when submitting show listings. Example:  Number of booths 50.  Att 15,000. 

Baby-sitting.  The act of watching a particular person in your booth, either keeping an eye on somebody who looks like he is about to steal or to keep tabs on little kids grabbing stuff and playing around.  Example:  I've got to baby-sit these 5 kids looking at the necklaces.  

Cup of Noodles.  This is what I say I am going to eat after a rough day at an event.  Example:  Well, it looks like I'm going to have Cup of Noodles tonight.

Craftmasters.  Short for Craftmaster's News.  A publication that lists many events throughout the year.  The bible.  Example:  Are they listed in Craftmaster's? or I checked out Craftmaster's and they said they get 20,000 for this event;  (promoter's send in attendance figures to the pub)  Seems more like 2,000.

 

Don't Tell Anyone.  A phrase used by a fellow vendor, explaining to you that he/she found a show that's really good and doesn't want any other vendors to know about.  Example:  I'm doing the  xxxxx  festival  next month and it's really good.  Netted a couple thousand.  It's not in Craftmaster's.  Don't tell anyone.   Disclaimer:  I'm not lucky enough to come across these kind of shows.  But, please if you find one, let me know AND I will definitely not tell anyone. 

 

Doozie.  The name for a show that is extremely slow and you are sitting there for hours at a time with virtually no customers

 

Drink and pee festival.  When the temps get pretty hot, you end up drinking a lot and making numerous bathroom trips throughout the day.  Example:  Hardly anybody buying here.  It's so stinking hot.  Another drink and pee festival.

 

FMM. Flea Market Mentality.  We see a lot of people at shows who possess a FLEA MARKET  MENTALITY.  They are only looking for the dollar, $2 items and think that everything you sell can be bought for less than a few bucks. 

 

Ghost Town.  A term used to describe a show that has a very small crowd. Usually occurs around 4:00PM at many festivals.  Example:  Man, it's like a ghost town over here.

 

Hella tight man.  Used by teenagers a couple years ago when they saw something they like.  Example:  Wow man, that's hella tight, dude.

 

I can do that.  A term used by people when they see their friend or family member interested in buying something unique in order to pursuade them not to buy.

 

Is that real?  A common term used by people wondering if something is 'real'.  Example:  Whoa, that's beautiful.  Is that real?

 

Jabba the Hutt.  I really don't want to get into name calling and please, no disrespect to the actual portrayed character.  This pertains to a certain lady who is involved with the Ripon Chamber of Commerce who really treated vendors poorly.

 

Junk.  Anything that a vendor sells that is not antique, arts and crafts or re-sell is classified as 'JUNK'.  Gosh Mark, I just walked all around this show and all I saw was junk.

 

Made the Fee.  Means that your gross sales have exceeded the fee you have paid for the booth.  Example:  Well, at least I made the fee.

 

Never coming back here.  Used by vendors when they have an extremly bad show.  Unfortunately many vendors do eat those words the following year when they return because they have no other choice for that weekend.

 

One Dollah.  I guess this is a greeting that some people use when looking at things in your booth.  Example:  One Dollah?   and to which you reply:  Oh, good morning to you too. Beautiful day, huh?

 

Riff-raff.  Undesirable  characters.  Example:  You had better watch your stuff, too much riff-raff hanging around here.

 

Roll up the streets.   In a town, everybody disappears at a certain time and there is nobody on the streets.  Example: Man oh man.  I did this festival over there last weekend and they 'rolled up the streets' at 4:00.

 

Shabang.  The whole ball of wax.  Everything including the extras.   Example:  Gosh, I got the whole shabang on that sandwich. 

 

Stinky Stall.  Porta pottie.  Example:  Time to hit the stinky stalls.

 

Take the money and run.  A common practive amongst a number of promoters whereby they charge high booth fees and provide little in return.  Very little money spent on advertising.  Also these promoters can be referred to as 'rip-offs'.

 

TGIO.  Thank gosh it's ovah.   Looked at my wife and told her 'TGIO' let's get the hell out of here!!!